Who Do You Think You Are?

Who do you think you are? I've got a friend that he loves to go on cruises, and he goes on these different cruises, doesn't know anybody, and he reinvents himself all the time. He is like a Texas cattle rancher that has these vast acres, or he's like a cryptocurrency baron. Now, I find that interesting. I'm not sure I could pull that off. But when we think about what is the core of our identity, who are we? Our culture has taught us to define it by what we do, our vocation. So when you meet someone or you're introduced to a group of people, typically, it's, "Tell me about yourself." And we lead with, "Well, I'm a business owner. I'm an electrician. I'm a nurse. I'm a teacher." And we tend to think that that is what defines us. A lot of times, though, the reality when you look underneath, our sense of identity is often formed in our families, what we experienced growing up, what people said to us, all those mitigating factors. And it's the voice on the inside that says, "Maybe you don't measure up. You're not good enough. You're a failure." Or there's something called imposter syndrome, one day you're going to be found out. And I get that. That's just a reality that we have to deal with. But to be a follower of Jesus, it means understanding that it is God who gives us our identity. It is through a relationship with Jesus Christ that all things are made new. We receive a new identity in Christ, and we've got to turn off those voices and those ideas about who we were, what defined us, and understand what God says about us. And really, this series is about learning that, it is about knowing that, it is about living in the freedom of that and letting that truth really transform you. And I assure you, when you can get there, it is liberating. And it's a process. It's not something that just occurs from one event or one message. Because you've got to go back and rethink and look at some of those things that forms the basis of who you think you are. And we're going to look at what God says. We're going to look at two passages that seem almost the same, but they're not. There's a slight difference. Look with me, and if you're watching online, you can see those notes there. At our campuses, there's the FOTP app. And then, of course, the listening guides, which are part of the program. In Galatians chapter four, beginning in verse four, says, "But when the set time had fully come, God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to redeem those under the law, that we might receive adoption to sonship. Because you are his sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, 'Abba, Father.' So you are no longer a slave, but God's child. And since you are his child, God has made you also an heir." I'll tell you, this passage and the one that we're going to read is very special to me because I'm adopted. I had the privilege of having an adoptive father who chose me deliberately, and also of later in life understanding who my biological father was. And so when we talk about adoption, in our culture, a lot of times we think that as maybe a second class or second-tier position or status. But that's not so, not according to Roman adoption. And God through the Apostle Paul, who gives us both Galatians and then what we're reading about in Romans, what he does is he gives us this metaphor for understanding how big God's love is, how the fact that He knows you. Here's the truth. He created you in His image. Even though you sinned and messed up as every person does since Adam and Eve, we, which is all of humanity, Jesus, who had no sin, died on the cross in our place to take the punishment that we deserve and then rose from the dead. Why? So that we could have a relationship with Him. And He adopts us. Roman adoption, though, was not, "Oh, well, you get the leftovers." No. It is a relationship where... And by the way, sonship, let me just say this, this is the masculine form. To be a son of God or a daughter of God is the same. But socially and culturally, the context was, is that only sons inherited the estate. So this idea of sonship is that God chooses you to be His child, deliberately chooses you, and here's what happens. Your rights to your prior family, they're abolished. They're no more. But that is good news because that means if there were any debts or whatever, anything that was owed, all that was cleared away, and your rights were all based in your new family.And in Roman adoption, it would be a man that would choose someone to perpetuate his name and also inherit his estate. So what we have in Galatians is the perspective of adoption from the courtroom. What Paul is doing is he's establishing this sort of legal setting based in Roman law of how adoption is this special... It is a privileged, I would even say maybe the highest form of social relationship in its day. When we come to this second passage in Romans chapter 8, beginning in verse 14, just realize the first is a courtroom setting. This is more of a living room setting, and I'll explain. Beginning in verse 14: "For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, 'Abba, Father.' The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs, heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory." What this establishes for us is it's the relational side. It describes the relationship of living as a son and having access to the Father. It is really about more how we relate to God in that relationship. Look, I need this. I need this series because this is probably the number one struggle in my life. Because I was adopted and because of some conversations that occurred, I really struggled with this idea of who am I? And it has affected my life. It has affected decisions that I've made, and it's something that I've been so focused on that it led to me... Actually, the only book I ever written was about this subject. It's called "Things Were Better Before You Came," based on a conversation. So I have been interested in really how do I not just know, but how do I feel and live in the freedom and truth of who God says I am and what he says about me? Three things that I want to share. First of all, don't measure God by a man. Don't measure God by a man. It is only natural and ordinary that we would basically view God through the lens of our earthly fathers. And so your father may have been present in the home but was never there, somewhat absent. You may have grown up without a father whatsoever, or you may have had a very passive father, or on the other extreme, one that was very harsh. And our tendency is to think about God, it's hard to relate to Him. So when we cry Abba or Father or Dad, He wants us to have that sort of close relationship with Him, but it's hard for us to get beyond maybe what we experienced in our families of origin. For me, as I told you, I was adopted. I've never met my biological father because he died at the age of 57 of cirrhosis. But to describe him from all the information I can gather, he was a notorious man. He was a criminal. I'm one of 13 or 14 children that we know of with nine different mothers. He was a murderer. He was just not a good person, extremely abusive. In fact, my adoption really occurred as a result of my birth mother trying to hide me from him. So I never knew that. I didn't discover who he was till after I was 41. And I never met him because he died prior to that. So I'll just tell you, I struggled a little bit. It's like realizing who he is and how is that going to affect me because the genetics and all of that. And man, you talk about messing up a sense of identity or basing it on the wrong thing. But here's the thing. My adoptive father, man, I love him. Gentle, yet strong, loving, tender, led our house well, committed to my mother, committed to our family, and I am so grateful. But look, even the best of fathers today, the best of fathers really pale in comparison. They're just really a blurry sort of representation of who God is because God is the perfect father who knows everything about you, who chooses to love you in spite of it all, who is there and present. We may not always feel it. It may not be relationally like we would like, but that's our issueBecause he is there. See, we've got to measure man and measure fathers by the template that God gives us instead of doing it in reverse. But that's just sort of the way we're wired. That's our natural tendency. In fact, I want to read to you too. Look with me at 1 John 3:1. Let's see what God says about us. "See what great love the Father has." He has this great love he's lavished on us that we should be called children of God, and that is what we are. That's what we need to know and tell ourselves over and over. We are children of God if you've made a commitment to Jesus Christ. When we start to see ourselves the way God really sees us, and we start believing and accepting the fact that He knows everything about us and chooses to love us anyway, then that will radically transform your life. That will give you the ability to not live in shame, not live in a fearful way, but to experience and know that you are a child. The second thing is be assured of your status. Be assured of your status before God. In verse 15 back in Romans 8, look with me at this. It said, "The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again. The Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, 'Abba, Father.'" God wants you to know without question that you are not a slave. Right? This culture, first century and those, they would've understood that. Today, not so much. But when I wrote about this, I described it as what I called an orphan mentality. And this is the idea that, man, if I don't do everything right, if I don't keep performing, if I don't make the people that are important happy in my life, and we apply it to God, it's like God has this family table, and if I do something wrong, I'm going to lose my seat at the table. But that's like a slave, right? That's thinking in the wrong way. It's not based on performance. It's not based on that at all. It's based on who God is and what He says about you. Here is the other thing that you need to know about Roman adoption that to me, it's amazing. This is why it's really a higher value of a relationship. And that is the adoption relationship, once done, once legal, it was permanent. It could not be severed. There's no taking back. "No, I've changed my mind. No, I'm sorry." There is a new identity that's been assigned. It's not going back. It's not going to change. That's the choice you made, so there you are. Of course, we look at it through imperfect human eyes, and it only makes sense, but God, He knows your past, your present, and your future. He knows everything about you, yet He still chooses you, and God wants us to not live in fear that we'll lose our seat, that we'll lose our position in the family. He wants us to not fear. He wants us to experience freedom and liberty. He wants us to feel completely comfortable approaching Him, and asking Him, and dialoguing with Him, because God wants a relationship with you. But assurance only comes if you really have a true relationship with Jesus Christ. It means more than just believing intellectually that Jesus Christ is God's Son, that He died on the cross and rose from the dead. Now, that's a part of it, but it's about believing it to the point in which you're willing to trust Him, that you're giving Him control of your life. He's not only theoretically your Savior, but He's your Lord. And when we make that kind of commitment, theologically, we understand it. It's called justified. We're declared right by God. The Bible says the Holy Spirit indwells us, seals us. Romans 8 tells us that nothing separates us from His love. No power, no principality. There's nothing. Once we're His, we're His. So if we don't have to worry about that, think about what that can do for you. How that maybe change your perspective, your thinking. How that begins to change your action. The third thing is you got to think like a son and not a slave. Think like a son and not a slave. Now, I want to show you a chart that's not in your notes. I would encourage you to take a picture of it. And this is a tool that just helps me, and again, I struggle with this. Here's the thinking. Let's start in the middle top, your status. All right? To transition this mindset to shift, you got to realize the slave mindset is, "I'm one mistake away from losing everything." But the son mindset, "God chose me to be in His family."First is eggshells, pins, and needles. The second is I'm safe. I'm secure. Your value with a slave mindset is I just need to do better. I need to keep performing. But really, the son mindset is my performance doesn't define me. Now, again, what is our motivation? As a son, we want to honor the Father because we're so grateful for the security that we have. Look, most of my life, I felt like this idea I just need to do better, performance is what it's all about, making sure people like me, this and that, affirmations. That's a miserable way to live. But to know and be secure, and is performance important? Yeah, but it doesn't define you. Your failures don't define you. Your mistakes, your misjudgment, that doesn't define you. God knows it. He's there. He's for you. Perception, God's probably disappointed in me. Oh, I've struggled with this. I tell you interesting story. God really called me to ministry. We use that phrase, but I felt like he was doing something in my life after years of rebellion, and I was 18 plus, almost 19 years old, and I remember really cluing my family in. I said, "Hey, let's go to dinner." We went to the mall there in Knoxville, Tennessee, and there was a cafeteria there. We're sitting around the table. There's my father, my mother, and my brother. Younger brother, adopted, 18 months younger. So I tell them what I believe God's doing in my life, and that he's called me, and I remember the looks of astonishment and shock on their faces. And my brother said something that I'll never forget. He's like, "Well, I guess God can use people like you." It's kind of funny now, but part of that was even rationalizing that maybe this is the way that God is going to help keep me on the straight and narrow. Control. I've got to hold it all together. It's all dependent on me. Oh, that's a hard place to be. There's so much that's not in our control. But the son mindset says God holds it all together. He's sovereign. He's all-powerful. He sees all. He's omnipresent, and it's look, I'm grateful to be a part of the family. We understand we still need to be stewards. Again, our goal is to glorify God because of what he's done for us. I want to encourage you. A lot of times you may be a follower of Jesus. You've made a commitment, but like me, you don't wake up feeling like a son every day, and so we want to shift and get to that place where we are really embodying this truth and living it out. And I think the way you do that is you use maybe something like this chart, and you remind yourself. I think a powerful thing to do is memorizing scripture, and I would encourage you to go back and memorize what we read in 1 John 3:1. But let me sum it up for you this way. This is what I'm asking you to do. Start living like you're free. If God's empowered you, if he's chosen you, then receive the gift of life and the gift of sonship, daughtership that he's given to you and get free of these generational patterns that you grew up in. You have to understand and process that for what it is. But I'm just telling you, I struggled. Forty years old plus, I was so concerned that sadly enough, I just wanted to outlive my father, my biological father. I turn 58 this year. It's crazy, but I feel like, okay. I don't understand that. I probably need to see a therapist about that. But I got there by the grace of God. Start living like you're free. Don't be shackled by those things. And stop living like you're on probation. Now, don't raise your hands, but has anybody ever been on probation? Very familiar with this in my household. And let me tell you, probation sets you up to fail. You have to do what the parole... Not parole, it's way different. Probation, you have to be there at a certain time, drug test periodically. Man, you've got to do what you need to do, and if you don't please that probation officer, man, they can pull that probation like that, and you can find yourself back in jail. And to make matters worse, again, don't raise your hand. Ever had an ankle monitor? They know where you are all the time, just waiting for you to slip up. Again, at times, I don't know why, but I find myself almost putting an ankle monitor on myself. Don't live like that. Know the truth and let the truth set you free. Look at that chart. Let's look at 1 John 3:1. I'm going to ask you to look at that. Get that into your heart. "See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God, and" what? "That is what we are." Next step, simply this. Stop trying to prove yourself. Trust Jesus and let him define you. Would you bow your head with me in these moments? I want to encourage you that if you are not certain that you have a real relationship with Christ, have any doubts about that, then would you, on that connection card, would you just let us know? You want to talk to someone, and I'm praying that you'll have the courage to follow through on that. If you're ready, you understand, you can just pray simply, Jesus Christ, I believe that you're the Son of God, that you died on the cross to pay for my sin, and you rose from the dead. I'm a sinner. I acknowledge that, and I agree to follow you. I trust you with my life. God, I pray for those of us over these next few weeks, God, that we would continue to come, continue to listen, continue to let what your word says shape us about who we are. Help us to break free and to live free in our new identity. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.